Archive for the ‘Happiness Notes’ Category

Happiness Blog Expanding!

happyspread.jpgHappiness Blog is moving, expanding and will include current happiness articles of interest.
See
HappinessHabit.com for a listing of Happiness Habits.

We’ll continue to respond to reader’s comments and what we read, like this for example:

Every day may not be good, but there’s something good in every day.” was posted by the Happiness Institute today…
“A negative judgment is the force behind all fears, anxieties and worries!”

Why say any day “May not be good?” When you start off that way, your negative projections can become a self fulfilling prophecy! Why not say, “How can I make the best of this day and every day?”

The International Herald Tribune writes Darrin McMahon author of “Happiness: A History” still has problems defining Happiness, so does Hootiepalooza who writes.. Wikipedia defines happiness As an effective state?!!!

Why not try our Happiness Habit definition…
A happy life is generally…

Pleasant & Pleasing,
Purposeful & Productive,
Prosperous & Spiritually Successful!”

“Happiness is the energized, elevated emotion we experience when we enjoy, appreciate or achieve a worthwhile goal.”

Deciding what happiness means to us helps us decide what steps we can take to attain it. For more insights see our Happiness Habit resources.

Tell us if you like our new approach. It may be a bit redundant at times, but repeating key concepts helps them to be reinforced and retained. That’s the way to build happiness!

See HappinessHabit.com for more happiness resources.

Copyright 2007,  Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

Happiness Numerator & Demoninator

denominator.jpgDoug Manning shares a wonderful insight into happiness in his posting today titled Denominator of Happiness at ProactiveLiving.BlogSpot.com

He says developing your Denominator is the key to happiness…

“The denominator is the real secret to developing an enduring sense of happiness and fulfillment. You focus on defining and developing your whole self. What are your interests? What do you value? What are your passions? What is your unique style? Where in the world can you be who you are?”

“These are the questions that give shape to defining a quality life. In the denominator world, quality is better than quantity, every denominator is unique, and the quickest way to get everything you want is to want exactly what you have.”

What a great approach! So much depends upon perceptions. People with much materially can still feel poor, especially if they are over extended financially. Other people who seem to have comparatively little can feel very rich and appreciative of all they do have.

We found the biggest barrier to happiness is the Fault Finding Feel Goods, all those terribly temping tendencies to judge, criticize and blame. A great happiness habit is to avoid all unnecessary, non-productive negativity. If the negativity doesn’t help you or protect you in some way, reject it.

If the negativity does actually help you, turn it into a series of positive action items to help you build your happiness and success. Hope this helps!

See HappinessHabit.com for more happiness insights.

Copyright 1999-    ,  Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

Scientists Can’t Define Happiness!

happybeaker.jpgDo you feel frustrated by reading about recent Happiness Research at major universities?

Are you looking for ways to be happier and find this research offers no clues as to what to do? You are not alone, we all face the same quandary. Here’s why…

Academic / scientific research usually involves qualities that are measurable and verifiable so the studies can be repeated with the same results. That’s why we have all the emphasis on measuring subjective happiness, relative indexes and comparative results.

Researchers must rely on qualities that can be measured so their studies can be repeated and yield similar results so they can be considered valid.

Measuring happiness does not describe how to attain it! They are two very different goals, processes and functions.

Many philosophers, psychiatrists and great thinkers throughout time have written that comparisons and analysis of Happiness actually defeats happiness. We agree. Why stop being happy to try to measure our happiness? What difference do these measurements make? Do they help you to be happier?

Once you measure relative happiness, what good does it do you?

If we want to be happy or happier, we need to focus on developing the skills, habits and strategies that lead to happy lives. There are simple, universal, eternal truths to living a happy, spiritually successful life. If we practice them we will be happier.

See HappinessHabit.com for more Happiness Habits!

Copyright 1999-    , Michele Moore All Rights Reserved.  Reprints.

Happy People Define Themselves

happysand2.jpgHabitually happy people have a clear idea of the sort of person they want to be and become.  They want to define how they go through life and they choose their moods and attitudes very carefully. They refuse to let bad things get them down for long. A spirit of revolt and rebellion helps fuel their happiness.

“Life is too short, we need to try to enjoy every minute of it as best we can,” one commented.

Certainly, dramatically changing life circumstances can alter your long term happiness if you allow it. See today’s posting from Michigan State

Habitually happy people seem to creatively find ways to enjoy life no matter what happens to them. They don’t let bad breaks define a bad mood for long. They find ways of triumphing over difficulties spiritually and emotionally.

See HappinessHabit.com for more happiness insights.

Copyright 1999-    , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

NBC’s Pursuit of Happiness – Monday

Fans of the Happiness Habit are talking about What NBC Didn’t Say About Happiness watch the video and read the articles.Happy NBC logo

They didn’t mention any of the enduring, universal time tested truths for living a happy, spiritually successful life…

Be Guided By Goodness, Fuel Your Life With Fun, Your Aim Determines Your Achievements, Avoid The Fault Finding Feel Goods, Focus On How You Want To Feel, Drive Discipline With Desire, Live According To Your Aspirations Not Your Inclinations, Touch People With A Positive Spirit, Live By Only The Highest And Best Values, Be Driven By Desire Not Duress, Love Propels Happiness!

NBC focused exclusively on external environmental factors that bring happiness citing positive relationships, work place appreciation and Laughter Classes. What do you do if you don’t have these things?

They close by saying, “the key is finding things that make you happy and keep you that way!” This means you are supposed to search for external things rather than build internal skills to be happy. Great for an advertiser based business!

Fans of the Happiness Habit know why Get Going With A Giggle is so helpful. Laugher loosens tight tummy muscles, helps you breathe easily from the bottom of your belly and stimulates serotonin, the brain’s natural happiness hormone.

NBC’s Happiness Test titled “Are You Satisfied With Your Life?” asks viewers to judge how ideal their lives are. Judgment generally quells happiness.

If you’re not satisfied, what do you do? Why not offer suggestions and insights that help people be happier?

In my city NBC’s Happiness segment was sandwiched between Fosamax and Aleve commercials. Drug companies are big network advertisers. The happiness experts shown come from Psychology departments at major universities that are dedicated to treating disease.

Is there any wonder NBC didn’t share any of the true, simple secrets to happiness?

The Happiness Habit pages in HappinenssHabit.com describe how to live a happy, spiritually successful life. Virtue is the basis for all happiness. Make Happiness YOUR Habit!

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

Happiness Hints For The Holidays

holidaysparkle.jpgDefeating The Dismal Drearies During The Holidays – Holiday Happiness Habits from HappinessHabit.com

Reject Self Pity – Feeling sorry for yourself is a sure route to sadness. If you catch yourself in self pity, STOP! Redirect your attention to positive, rewarding thoughts and activities.

Negative Judgments Cause Pain – To enjoy happy holidays, stop judging. Measuring life by other people’s should’s and ought’s is always discouraging and self defeating.

Design and Create a Fun, Rewarding Holiday that fits your circumstances. Decide to have a great holiday and then make it happen.

Doing Good Helps Us To Feel Good! Spend time helping people who genuinely need and appreciate your assistance.

Avoid Rich Foods and Excess Alcohol – That lift your spirits for a few moments and then leave you feeling bloated, guilty and unhappy for hours.

Exercise Aggressively – It’s a great way to work off stress, stay in shape, feel great and see other people.

Share The Holiday Spirit – Smile, speak and greet strangers warmly. Extend a genuinely warm, holiday welcome to everyone you meet.

When we summon up a sense of joy and honestly project it, we can’t help but raise our own spirits as well. Remember the people who need our warmth the most are often those who are least able to return it.

Full Happiness Habits for the Holidays article on American Chronicle
Other Happiness Articles on American Chronicle. The Happiness Habits pages at HappinessHabit.com share more insights about how to live a happy life all year round. Make Happiness Your Holiday Habit!

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

Happiness Habits: Your Best or THE Best?

Habitually Happy People continually try to do their best, be their best and feel their best all of the time. This is a secret to happiness. The key is, aim to do YOUR best.

When we know we have done OUR best, we can feel confident we could do no more in that specific situation. We feel comfortable with what we have done and we can let go of results knowing we have done our best.

Habitually happy people direct their lives by their own internal standards which are usually extraordinarily high. They continually try to do THEIR best, not someone else’s best.

The alternative perspective relies primarily on outside standards. Look around to see what everyone else is doing. This can lead to harsh comparisons and misery.

When other people are always better than you are, how can you possibly feel good about yourself? This perspective drives people down with their own deflating comparisons!

Other people always have to be THE BEST in order to feel good about themselves, which drives them to continually dominate and control to establish and maintain their superiority.

Superiority Separates! No one likes to be around people who always have to be better than they are. We may tolerate it from bosses because of economic necessity, but we don’t like or respect these supposedly superior people.

Habitually happy people set their own standards, they are emotionally independent and they separate people from their behaviors. This works for their view of themselves as well as their assessments of others.

When they are far better than the people around them they still strive to improve. They also feel comfortable bumbling in the company of experts because it’s a true expression of who they are and where they are at the present time. They profit and grow from their mistakes and experiences and decide to be different the next time around.

When President Jimmy Carter was a young naval officer, Admiral Rickover asked him about his grades at Annapolis. Carter answered proudly, “Sir, I graduated 59th out of a class of 820″.

Rickover replied,”Did you always do your best?”

Carter was forced to admit he had not, and the Admiral asked, “Why not?” Carter used this as the theme of his presidential campaign, and as the title of his book, “Why Not The Best?”.

Doing OUR BEST is a key to happiness and success. This allows us to set our own standards which may far exceed what is being done by others. It also gives us comfort as we begin to work our way up a long learning curve to ever greater expertise.

We feel happy and successful only when we do well based on our own internal evaluation. When we set our standards based on realistic assessments of Our Best, we are aiming at goals that are realistic, attainable and good.

Copyright 1999-   ,  Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

Live According To Your Aspirations Not Your Inclinations

turtletracks2.jpgLive According To Your Aspirations Not Your Inclinations

There is always tension between what our past history and old habits incline us to do and how the person we aspire to be acts. That’s why it is so important to Live According To Your Aspirations Not Your Inclinations.

Our Aspirations include everything we want to achieve in life, the happy, spiritually successful person we Aspire to be, the happy life we want to live, what we want to give to others. People who don’t have Aspirations or desires to develop themselves and achieve something of value tend to stay stuck as they are.

Focusing on what we want to achieve and the happy, spiritually successful person we want to be allows us to change and direct our lives in new, more successful ways.

Once we See It in our mind’s eye, Desire It and make it an objective, Believe It and build our confidence, then we can Achieve It. Dwelling on what is wrong and what we don’t want wastes time and is very counterproductive.

The key to building happiness is to continually focus on what you want to achieve until it becomes habit. Practice happiness skills until they become your own new powerful happiness habits. Practice being your best self all of the time and Live According To Your Aspirations, Not Your Inclinations.

Copyright 1999-    , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved.  Reprints.    More Happiness Habits

Happiness Habit Hints For The Holidays

Happiness Habit Hints For The Holidays

Do Habitually Happy People ever get lonesome, frustrated, disappointed or down like the rest of us over the holidays? The answer is yes, absolutely! But they bounce back quickly. Here are some of their Happiness Habit hints for the holidays:

Be Adventuresome And Creative – Habitually Happy People know there are usually lots of great ways to do anything, including the holidays, well. Different is often very delightful. Holding on to rigid expectations and thinking there is just one right way to do things is a major source of holiday pain. Instead, resolve to be creative and invite others along on an exciting new holiday adventure.

Flexibility Is An Important Key To Happiness – Be willing to reposition your perspectives, change your plans and even your preferences to cast off difficulties so you can honestly embrace good will. Resolve that no matter what happens, you are going to have a great time and help others do so too.

Self Pity Is A Sure Route To Sadness – Feeling sorry for yourself is always self defeating. Don’t do it! The Poor Me’s manufacture self made misery. Focus on anything and everything else but yourself. Spend time helping someone who genuinely needs your assistance. Take care of yourself and remember that excessive self concern is a major source of unhappiness.

Sometimes Strangers Offer Safety – Families and even fond friendships can turn toxic over the holidays. Involving new people changes group dynamics. So does changing the place, the time, the theme, the menu. Altering anything can help break bad ruts. Misery means we’re meant to change.

Drive Your Holidays With Delight – Resolve to have a good time all the time. Don’t let any one or any thing shake you your determination to savor and enjoy each moment as much as you can. Don’t hand control of your holiday happiness over to anything that threatens to drag down your spirits.

Negative Judgments Cause Pain – In fact, most of our emotional pain is caused by our negative judgments. To enjoy happy holidays, stop judging. Measuring life by should’s and ought’s brings sadness. Envision the holiday you want to create and let judgment keep you on track to achieve that goal.

Give Without Strings Attached – Decide what you want to do because YOU want to do it out of genuine goodness. Let goodness be your guiding goal and your sole reward. Don’t give with strings attached in order to get. If the returns don’t come back, you will be disappointed.

Assess Reality Accurately And Don’t Get Carried Away – It’s easy to swept up with exuberant holiday joy. Over extending yourself, incurring big bills, losing sleep, forgoing wise diet and drink choices is not the path to peace or happiness. Excess in anything invariably brings pain, not joy.

Guard Your Personal Time Carefully – Holidays are times of giving, but preserve some precious personal time for yourself. Normal schedules are often discarded, it’s easy to be on the run all the time. Stop to enjoy time with yourself. Habitually Happy People seem gregarious, but they often say they need plenty of time for themselves. Preserving personal time is often the best investment you can make for holiday happiness.

Share The Spirit – Smile, greet and speak to strangers. Extend a warm, holiday welcome to everyone you meet. When we summon up a sense of joy and honestly project it, we can’t help but raise our own spirits, and we might just brighten someone else’s holiday as well.

Share your favorite holiday Happiness Hints – Post them in a comment below.

Happy Holidays To You All!

Michele Moore & The Happiness Habit Team

Happiness Habit: Skills & Strategies of Habitually Happy People
Copyright 1999 –     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

Lie, Cheat or Steal?

“You Can’t Lie, Cheat or Steal Your Way To Happiness!”

Habitually Happy people are high achievers, they believe in trying to be their best and doing their best all of the time. They are goal oriented, but there are lines they definitely will not cross.

“When I do my best I can let go of the results knowing I can do no more,” one said.

“You cannot lie, cheat or steal your way to happiness,” another commented. “You can lie, cheat and steal your way to riches, power and position. We all know people who do, but none of them seem to be truly happy.”

That’s true, they know they are not doing their best and they are not proud of their actions. They also don’t want to be found out.  They often feel empty or like fakes or frauds.

For some people money is all important. The more they value it, the less happy they seem to be. And there are lots of people who have money but no happiness.

For others power is the primal drive. Power and control over others distorts relationships and keeps the honesty and love that propels true happiness from ever flowering.

Think of people with lots of money and power who have lost touch with reality precisely because of these things. A certain fading, moon walking rock star comes immediately to mind.

“I have never been able to conceive how any rational being could propose happiness to himself from the exercise of power over others.” Thomas Jefferson, Third President of the United States (1743-1826)

Jefferson was a man with money and power who realized the emptiness of both.

Can you be happy with lots of money, power and fame? Absolutely! But not if you make them your major concern.

The people who are happiest have made happiness their primary aim and goodness their guiding goal.

Copyright 1999 –     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.