Posts Tagged ‘habitually happy’

What Are Habitually Happy People?

happy2person-00We all know a few special people who always seem to be truly UP, energized and happy. They light up a room and our lives with their presence.

They seem to be having a good time all of the time and continually radiate genuine joy.

They are very loving people. They love life, they love what they do and they love the people around them, they love themselves.

They live without prejudices and embrace the entire world eagerly.
They have high integrity.  We trust, admire and respect them.
They are good decision makers and leaders.
They are high achievers who love creative challenges.
They always enthusiastically try to do their best, be their best and encourage others to be their best too.
They refuse to let difficulties or problems distress or bother them.
When they are down, it never seems to last for long.

Enthusiasm, Energy, Achievement, Integrity, Happiness and Joy Characterize Their Lives.

You know some of these special people.  They are not the most prominent or powerful people we know but they certainly are the happiest.  We may wish we knew how to be more like them.

Happiness Habit interviewed and studied Habitually Happy, genuinely joyous people from all different walks of life and life situations.  We identified the key Values, Beliefs, Habits, Ideals and Boundaries characteristic of happy thought.  We call these special qualities Happiness Habits.

If you choose to adopt and practice Happiness Habits, you too will become happy or happier despite what is happening to you and around you.

Explore and Enjoy HappinessHabit.com, HappinessBlog.com and HappinessInHardTimes.com Comment on our postings.  Share your thoughts and insights.

Wishing you great happiness and spiritual success,
Michele Moore and the Happiness Habit® Team

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness insights.

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Positive Psychology Can Be Dangerous!

Blind Smiley FacePositive Psychology is very popular in American academia today.

Positive psychologists believe we can all be happy or happier by being more positive.

They suggest we substitute more positive judgments for negative ones, spend time on Gratitude Lists and journal good things that happen in our lives.

They believe the more time we spend focusing on positives over negatives, the happier we will be.

They preach the Gospel of Learned Optimism, that we can learn to be more optimistic in our assessments of life and be happier.

The Positive Psychology Happiness Formula is:
Positive Judgments => Produce Happiness
Negative Judgments => Mean Misery
Therefore More Positive Judgments Mean More Happiness

While there is some truth to this statement (it is a variant of the First Law of Happiness – Our Focus Determines Our Feelings) they overlook a number of key points:

The first is optimism can cause us to overlook or ignore important danger signals and warning signs that help us thrive and survive. We are told we just need to be more positive, to see more benefits and fewer threats. This can be dangerous.

The Happiness Habit model is very different. Habitually Happy people assess reality very accurately and take decisive and often very creative action. Once they are confident they have made good decisions, they put the full force of positive expectations behind their plans and drive to excel and do well.

They know the dangers of excessive optimism and react accordingly.

More importantly, Habitually Happy people don’t ignore misery. They know misery has messages and meaning.

Misery Is Meant To Make Us Move

Misery is meant to make us move and take action – it is a signal something needs to change or is changing.

Misery means we need to change what we are doing, how we think, how we feel or all perhaps all three. If our world is changing, we need to change to adapt, adjust and end our misery.

Stuffing, ignoring or replacing negative signals with learned optimism is not a universal route to happiness and spiritual success.

When our heart, gut, soul and being are screaming something is wrong, it’s not wise to try to pretend everything is fine.

Examine those negative feelings, understand what they are saying and react accordingly.  Are threats real or merely effects of past conditioning, environment and experience?  Can we turn those negatives into positives?

Assess Reality Accurately. Explore and Appreciate What Negative Feelings Are Trying to Say.

Be Decisive, Make Effective Decisions.  Put The Full Force of Positive Expectations Behind All Your Plans.

Use a Drive To Excel and Do Well to Propel You to Happiness and Spiritual Success.

Try To Enjoy and Make The Most of Each and Every Moment.
Be Realistic, Not Blind.

See HappinessHabit.com for more information about happiness and spiritual success.

Copyright © 1999-      Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. This material may NOT be published, broadcast, distributed or rewritten without permission from the authors.

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Happiness and Greatness

Happiness and GreatnessA Drive to Do Well and Excel Are Keys to both Happiness and Greatness!

Habitually happy people want to do their best, feel their best, be their best all the time.

They also continually and creatively look for ways to make their best even better.

This is the same mindset described as the keys to Greatness by Fortune Magazine.

The article discusses recent studies of people who have excelled in their sport or profession, examining what it takes to be great.

The good news is… greatness in a skill, sport or profession does not come from natural talents or gifts. Greatness is open to any and all of us.

Greatness comes from rugged, rigorous hard work and a determined drive and desire to continually improve our skills.

The same principles hold true for happiness.  By continually and creatively finding ways to live more happily and successfully, we can grow our happiness and spiritual success.

For more insights and happiness resources see  HappinessHabit.com 

Copyright © 1999-    , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. This material may NOT be published, broadcast, distributed or rewritten without permission from the authors.

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Happiness, Goodness & Giving

Happiness Target - Goodness and GivingHabitually Happy people are amazingly altruistic. They rarely pass up a chance to be kind when it costs them little or risks them little.

Practicing Continual Kindness Is A Way To Be Happy.

They are also very adept at protecting themselves, pursuing and achieving their goals. They are not “people pleasers,” they do good because it makes them feel good.

It’s an example of the First Law of Happy Thought:
Our Focus Determines Our Feelings.

When We Focus Our Time, Attention and Energy On Doing Good We Feel Good. More importantly…

We can’t expect others to treat us well if we don’t extend the same care, concern and compassion we want from them to them.

I recently heard a noted economist speak on the subject of giving at a church stewardship dinner. He relayed recent studies linking charitable giving to happiness, but missed a few key points:

Altruism Is Attractive – We tend to like and trust altruistic people because we believe they place goodness, right action and the welfare of others on an equal plane with their own concerns.

It’s hard to like or trust selfish people who don’t show integrity.

Make Goodness A Guiding Goal – Doing good makes us feel good. Giving appropriately makes us feel good because we know we are contributing to worthwhile causes. And the flip side is…

When we don’t feel good about our actions, we can’t truly enjoy the rewards those actions bring. Try the Gold Fish Test – if the world knew the details of your actions, how would you and they feel? Worry isn’t worth it, secrets cause stress.

Love Not Logic Prompts Giving – People need clear, compelling visions of the benefits their gifts provide and a love for the cause in order to support them enthusiastically.

It’s a twist on the old sales adage, “Logic makes people think, emotions make them act.” Build benefits and love before asking for expanded contributions.

There’s an important difference between really wanting to do something and feeling we must, ought or have to do it.

Love Propels Happiness And Giving – Demonstrate how to feel good, proud and joyful about giving. Drive giving with desire.

Acquire The Qualities You Admire In Others – Seek good role models and visions of excellence which help to define the steps to achieve them.

Truly happy, successful people are usually very kind, caring, honest, charitable and compassionate.

Look Like and Live Like the Leaders You Admire. You’ll find they usually give very generously.

Action, Activity and Achievement Are Keys To Happiness. Doing Good Makes Us Feel Good.

Explore HappinessHabit.com for more happiness insights.

Copyright © 2007, Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. This material may NOT be published, broadcast, distributed or rewritten without permission from the authors.

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Happiness and “Work”

gears3largeWork Is A Series of Steps To
Success, Achievement
And Satisfaction

The word “work” conveys wonderful feelings and images…

A “work of art” describing special beauty, or…

“life’s work,” the pride and satisfaction we gain from personal and professional achievements.

Work is wonderful.

For other people, “work” means misery, difficulty and pain.

Anything associated with “work” must be avoided at all cost.
“Work” is by nature unattractive, burdensome and distasteful.
“Work” deprives us of fun and enjoyment.

Habitually Happy people enjoy very different perspectives. They view “Work” as steps to success and achievement.  They love to achieve and succeed so they always try to enjoy their work.

Habitually happy people decide what they are going to do and then they decide to find ways to enjoy it.  The best way to excel and do well at anything is to cultivate a love for what you do.

They know viewing something they have to do as dreary, difficult or distasteful allows bad attitudes to work against them. They align their attitudes to support their goals, ambitions and decisions.

Even dull,  repetitive work feeds families and allows people to pursue hobbies and higher goals.  Take pride in doing simple things extraordinarily well.

View Work As Steps To Success And Achieving Your Goals. Relish and enjoy each step and you will never toil again.

For more Happiness Habits At Work  and Happiness Habits see HappinessHabit.com

Copyright © 1999-      , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. This material may Not be published, broadcast, distributed or rewritten without permission from the authors.

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Happiness is Not Lotus Land

happylily.jpgHabitually happy people consciously choose their moods and their attitudes, because they like to enjoy all life has to offer.

They don’t want to waste time in bad, unhappy, non productive moods or mental states.

They decide what they are going to do and they consciously decide to enjoy it. They manage their actions and their attitudes very effectively.

They don’t continually look outside of themselves for happiness. They create their own joy though their actions, appreciation and their achievements.

This is a very different perspective from people who continually seek happiness outside of themselves. When they can’t find it, they are often disappointed and dejected. Some retreat into a mythical sort of lotus land to find some semblance of happiness and bliss.

Enduring Happiness is not a retreat from reality but a different perspective on reality.

  • It’s knowing we are truly at our best when we are up and happy, so we try to be that way all of the time.
  • It’s knowing life is far richer and beautiful when we are appreciating all that’s around us, not judging.
  • Happiness definitely requires an independent, rebellious spirit that refuses to let difficulties take control of our hearts and minds. Refusal to let difficulties define our identity, feelings or our actions is a key to happiness.

Is it easier to be happy when everything around us is beautiful and life is going well? Absolutely, especially if you already embrace and practice these happiness habits.

If you don’t, no measure of good things coming into your life will ever bring you enduring happiness.

We can use difficult times to strengthen our happiness skills and our determination to triumph over distress and despair.

You decide what you want to do.

See HappinessHabit.com for more insights on how to live a happy life.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

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Happiness Habits: Your Best or THE Best?

Habitually Happy People continually try to do their best, be their best and feel their best all of the time. This is a secret to happiness. The key is, aim to do YOUR best.

When we know we have done OUR best, we can feel confident we could do no more in that specific situation. We feel comfortable with what we have done and we can let go of results knowing we have done our best.

Habitually happy people direct their lives by their own internal standards which are usually extraordinarily high. They continually try to do THEIR best, not someone else’s best.

The alternative perspective relies primarily on outside standards. Look around to see what everyone else is doing. This can lead to harsh comparisons and misery.

When other people are always better than you are, how can you possibly feel good about yourself? This perspective drives people down with their own deflating comparisons!

Other people always have to be THE BEST in order to feel good about themselves, which drives them to continually dominate and control to establish and maintain their superiority.

Superiority Separates! No one likes to be around people who always have to be better than they are. We may tolerate it from bosses because of economic necessity, but we don’t like or respect these supposedly superior people.

Habitually happy people set their own standards, they are emotionally independent and they separate people from their behaviors. This works for their view of themselves as well as their assessments of others.

When they are far better than the people around them they still strive to improve. They also feel comfortable bumbling in the company of experts because it’s a true expression of who they are and where they are at the present time. They profit and grow from their mistakes and experiences and decide to be different the next time around.

When President Jimmy Carter was a young naval officer, Admiral Rickover asked him about his grades at Annapolis. Carter answered proudly, “Sir, I graduated 59th out of a class of 820″.

Rickover replied,”Did you always do your best?”

Carter was forced to admit he had not, and the Admiral asked, “Why not?” Carter used this as the theme of his presidential campaign, and as the title of his book, “Why Not The Best?”.

Doing OUR BEST is a key to happiness and success. This allows us to set our own standards which may far exceed what is being done by others. It also gives us comfort as we begin to work our way up a long learning curve to ever greater expertise.

We feel happy and successful only when we do well based on our own internal evaluation. When we set our standards based on realistic assessments of Our Best, we are aiming at goals that are realistic, attainable and good.

Copyright 1999-   ,  Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Reprints.

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