Posts Tagged ‘michele moore’

Bouncing Back Quickly, Powerfully

BouncingBall-01Disasters and deep disappointments are an inevitable part of life.  Here are secrets to bouncing back quickly and powerfully:

Focus on Fixes – Ask yourself, what can you do to correct the problem, ensure it doesn’t happen again, gain from your pain, learn, grow, strengthen your skills and power to build happiness and future success?

Don’t Beat Yourself Up, Blame, Complain or Criticize! Focusing on where you are now and what’s wrong keeps you stuck in the problem and misery.  Focusing on what you want to do differently and where you want to go in the future helps you to grow and achieve it.

We don’t feel better by blaming, beating ourselves up or by focusing on problems. Beating ourselves up reinforces errors we want to avoid.  It focuses time and attention on what’s wrong, not on building new skills and strategies that bring happiness and future success.

We Bounce Back by embracing our goals, our Best Selves and by focusing on what we want to achieve and do differently and then working hard to attain it.

Turn Anguish Into Achievement – Turn anger, regret and anguish into positive actions that improve the situation and help you to be happy and more effective in the future.

Worrying about problems is very different from solving or resolving problems.  Regret and remorse do not always cause reform. Desire and Determination To Do Things Differently Bring Positive Change.

Ask yourself, Is being upset helping me to fix the problem or to be more effective in the future?  How long do I want to be upset?  How miserable do I want to be and for how long?

Rebounding Rapidly:  Think about how will you feel when the problem is behind you, when you have successfully rebounded.  Visualize yourself successfully recovered from the problem.  Feel those powerful positive feelings, embrace and project them.  Practice feeling and being in rebound mode until it becomes habit.

We Can Rebound More Quickly By Focusing On How We Will Feel When We Have Rebounded From The Difficulty And Then Consciously Taking On Those Attitudes And Perspectives.  Bad things happen but they don’t have to make you miserable for long.

Our Best: We are truly at our best and able to perform our best when we are UP, confident, energized, focused and happy.  Don’t tear yourself down, distract or distress yourself.   Don’t detract from your ability to excel and do well.

See Yourself At Your Best, Feel Those Powerful, Confident Feelings And Project Them. They Will Become Genuinely Yours.  More Bouncing Back

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness insights.

Try To Have A GOOD Time ALL THE TIME

Freedom2HappyJumpWe are at our best and able to perform our best when we are Up, energized, enthusiastic and happy.

Habitually Happy People try to have a good time all of the time. They know this is the best way to perform well.

Summoning up energy, enthusiasm and determination to complete tasks well is just as important as defining good plans.

Decide what you are going to do and find ways to make work enjoyable, rewarding and meaningful.  Fuel your life and your work with fun.  When you make work fun you never have to toil again.

Loving your work, taking pride in what you do and finding ways to make it fun and fulfilling makes work flow effectively and efficiently.

“Ridiculous” cry critics, “You can’t expect to have fun and a good time all of the time!”

“I can!”  Habitually Happy people reply, or “I can try.”  “With an attitude like that you’ll never be truly happy!”

Habitually Happy People try to get the most from every moment, they try to have a good time all of the time.   Because they try to find ways to enjoy life and work, they generally do.

They don’t allow themselves to waste time in self pity or in making their own misery.  “Time spent in a down mood is time wasted” one happy person commented.

“You can choose your mood and attitude,” another happy person said, “I choose to try to be happy and feel good almost all of the time.”

They creatively reinvent tasks to make them fun, challenging and rewarding. They don’t tolerate down, distressed or dismal moods for long.

You Never Feel Better By Focusing On How Badly You Feel.

Explore, Enjoy And Employ Skills And Strategies Used By Habitually Happy People And Become Happier Yourself.

Make Happiness YOUR Habit!

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness insights.

Can You REALLY Be Happy ALL of The Time?

SadFaceOf Course Not! All the Habitually Happy people we interviewed and studied said they experienced sadness, grief, distress, regret and various forms of mental malaise just like the rest of us.

Habitually Happy people are not immune to difficulties, they are not unfeeling, they are not unrealistically happy during devastating disasters, death or difficult times.

The all report occasional unexplained down times, dismal drearies, sadness for no reason.  They generally bounce back quickly and report unexplained sadness often clears within a day.

Habitually Happy People are masters of using the power of love, positive expressions and enthusiastic feelings to buoy their spirits and to energize and encourage people around them.  They know how to make the very best out of difficult circumstances.

Since they consciously try to enjoy, appreciate and have a good time all the time, they generally do.  This shortens and lessens their periods of sadness.

Remember, Depression Is A Big Business. A great deal of money is made from misery, misinformation and manipulation.  Beware of falling into its marketing trap.

Here are some key Happiness Habit® insights that can help:

The First Law Of Happiness:  Our Focus Determines Our Feelings. Focusing our time and attention on bad things makes us feel sad, angry, worried or distressed.  Shifting our attention to good things makes us feel energized, excited and enthusiastic.

Moving from problems to positive, possible solutions usually makes everyone feel much better.

Focusing On Doing Good Things Makes Us Feel Good.

Whatever We Focus Our Minds On
Expands In Our Experience.
We Never Feel Better Focusing On How Badly We Feel.

Exercising Excites Energy And Enthusiasm.  Get Moving!
Action, Activity & Achievement Are Energizing, Encouraging, Empowering.

Take Positive Steps To Shake Off Sadness.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness insights.

Try To Be YOUR Best All Of The Time

sunflowerTo be happy, practice doing YOUR best, feeling YOUR best and being YOUR best self all of the time.

This helps you feel your best.

It illustrates The First Law of Happiness:  Our Focus Determines Our Feelings.

When we focus on things we think are bad, we feel sad, angry, anxious or depressed.  Shifting our attention to good things makes us feel energized, excited and enthusiastic.

Make it your goal to do YOUR best, feel YOUR best and be YOUR best all of the time.

It’s important to emphasize it’s YOUR best and not someone else’s best.  How do we do this?

We all occasionally enjoy special, magical days when we are feeling, thinking  and performing at our very best.

Remember those days in vivid detail. Recall how you felt, acted and thought.  Describe it in clear, specific detail. People often say…

“My mind is alert, sharp, focused, I am able to concentrate very well. A relaxed powerful energy is flowing through my body. My spirit seems to soar with joy. My concentration is intense without my body feeling tense.”

Remember one of those special days, recall your thoughts and feelings. Feel the rhythm and beat of that marvelous, positive energy flowing through your body. Connect with those feelings and take them on for yourself. Project them and they will be yours.

You can’t be at your best while thinking about how badly you feel!

See yourself performing YOUR best, feeling YOUR best and thinking YOUR best.  Feel those feelings, step into that zone, project those feelings and they will be genuinely yours.

You can now be at your best whenever you wish!

It’s a great way to be happy.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness insights.

Don’t Beat Yourself UP!

UpsetApe02Don’t Beat Yourself UP!

You Have To Be At Your Best To Perform Your Best.

Tearing Yourself Down Is Distracting, It Destroys Your Confidence And Detracts From Your Ability To Do Well. 

Beating Yourself Up is very counterproductive.

You’re spending all your time, energy and attention focusing on what went wrong and how terrible it is and then you are burning it into your memory with lots of negative energy.

No time or attention is spent on identifying, learning and strengthening skills and strategies that will help you avoid the error in the future and build success and happiness.

Why do we Beat Ourselves Up?

When we were little, parents and authority figures may have punished us to protect us from the dangers of wrongdoing.

If we ran into a busy street without looking, we may have received a spank on the rump to discourage us from doing it again.

Punishment Causes Pain And Pain Prompts Avoidance.

What we really need to learn is to recognize there is danger, stop, look carefully both ways before we cross a busy street.  Beating yourself up doesn’t teach the skills we need to survive and be safe and successful in the future.

On some level we also may have learned the wrong lesson, that beating ourselves up is the way to improve our performance and make ourselves better – so we do it to ourselves.

By focusing on where we are and what’s we did wrong we stay stuck.  We reinforce our errors by rehearsing and reliving them in our minds

Beating Yourself Up Reinforces Errors You Want To Avoid.

Remorse and Regret do not necessarily bring Reform.

By focusing on where we want to go and what we want to do differently in the future, we grow.

Channel Anger And Anguish Over Errors And Mistakes Toward Fixing Problems And Identifying And Practicing Skills That Will Make You Successful And Happy In The Future.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com for more happiness quotes and insights.

Avoid The Fault Finding Feel Goods

The Fault Finding Feel Goods are one of the biggest barriers to happiness and spiritual success. Avoid them if you want to be happy.

What are the Fault Finding Feel Goods?

The Fault Finding Feel Goods are all those terribly tempting tendencies to criticize, blame, complain or judge to elevate ourselves and our self esteem. FFFGs-2003

The Fault Finding Feel Goods make us feel good on some level by putting other things or other people down.

The problem is that we’re focusing on negatives and that’s not the way to happiness or to spiritual success!

Since we feel good by complaining about what is wrong, we have no vested interest in trying to help improve it or change it.

This means we tend to stay stuck in our negativity and to continue wallowing in wrongs.

The Fault Finding Feel Goods take many forms… blame, complaints, judgmental criticism, ridicule and bigotry.

Have you ever met a critic who seemed really happy? Their primary source of joy is putting something or someone else down.

Recognize and Reject the Fault Finding Feel Goods if you want to be happy and spiritually successful.

Refocus your time and attention on positive, inspiring thoughts and actions that will help you to achieve, succeed and be happy.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness insights.

Avoid All Unnecessary Negativity

NoNegativityHuge increases in happiness come from simply deciding to avoid all unnecessary, non-productive negativity.

If the negativity is unnecessary and non-productive, resolve to avoid it.

Don’t give it your time and attention. Don’t repeatedly replay it in your mind.

Let it go.  Focus on positive, productive activities and aspirations.

Sometimes you cannot physically escape.  A boss, parent, loved one or authority figure may have the power to keep you there.

Listen, learn all you can but decide to be unaffected. Don’t give them the power to hurt you.

Smile, nod very nicely in bobble headed agreement while your thoughts and attention are focused on positive and productive activities far away.

Avoiding The Fault Finding Feel Goods and All UnNecessary, Non-Productive Negativity are powerful prescriptions for happiness and spiritual well being.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness insights

Savor, Enjoy & Appeciate – SEA

When we are stressed and overwrought, it’s easy to loose sight of all the beauty and goodness that continually surrounds us.

Stop and spend time SEAing, Savoring, Enjoying and Appreciating simple pleasures that bring  joy and happiness.

Deciding to use pleasant, enjoyable experiences to raise your spirits and refusing to let negative forces to drag you down is an important key to happiness.

OceanWavesHBlogSavor Pleasing Sensations – warm sunshine on your face, a soft breeze on your skin, the taste of a favorite tea.

Enjoy Pleasant Experiences – great music, a brisk walk, a warm shower, working hard on valued activities, a good book.

Appreciate Activities that bring joy – admiring achievements, a beautiful sunset,  acts of kindness, generosity and compassion.

Whenever you notice something wonderful or beautiful, resolve to spend a few special extra moments SEAing it too, Savoring, Enjoying and Appreciating its goodness to lift your spirits.

It’s a technique that elevates your mood and super charges your well-being whenever you need it.

Nothing around to Savor, Enjoy or Appreciate?

Recall and relive those special times when you felt absolutely marvelous.  Use those memories to brighten your mood, energize, and expand your appreciation of the pleasant things in life.

Remember the energy and enthusiasm of an exciting day, the warmth of tender moments or the wonderful rubbery feelings of relaxation when you need to calm down.

Use pleasant experience in the present and in memories to brighten your mood whenever you wish.

When you SEE something wonderful, spend a few extra seconds Savoring, Enjoying & Appreciating, SEAing it too. It builds happiness.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness quotes.

Dealing With Dangerous, Deranged Thoughts

angrymonkeyEveryone has dangerous, deranged thoughts from time to time,  even the happiest,  most admirable,  sane and stable people among us.

Dangerous, deranged thoughts can drive us crazy and do us great harm if we do not deal with them quickly, dramatically and effectively.

The Key to Happiness and Spiritual Success Is to Immediately RECOGNIZE  Dangerous, Deranged Thoughts for What They Really Are, RAPIDLY REJECT  Them and Immediately REDIRECT ATTENTION To Positive Thoughts, Actions and Objectives.

Don’t give dangerous, deranged thoughts time and attention to take hold. It’s always easier to step out of a shallow spot than having to climb out of a deep hole.

The Happiness Habit  “Practice Being The Person You Want To Be” Is a Powerful, Positive Protector.

When you encounter bad, dangerous deranged thinking, immediately reject it and redirect your attention to answering the question, “How would the person I want to be think, act and feel, what would they do?”

Visualize yourself as the person you want to be, take on their perspectives and persona and “Practice Being The Person You Want To Be.” It’s that simple!

What are dangerous and deranged thoughts? Thoughts that are illegal, harmful or detrimental to your health and well-being or hurtful to others.

This illustrates The Three Fundamental Truths that are the Foundation of the Happiness Habit:

1) The most important decision we make on a moment to moment basis is where we focus our time and attention. The sum of these decisions is our life.

2) Whatever we focus our minds upon expands in our consciousness. Whatever we give time and attention to grows in our reality.

3) Thoughts have consequences just like actions have consequences. Beware of the Consequences of Your Thoughts is just an important warning as Beware of the Consequences of Your Actions!

Try it the next time you are hit with a dangerous, deranged thought.

Recognize and Reject Dangerous, Deranged Thoughts and Redirect Your Attention To Positive Activities and Objectives.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Links to our website and pages are welcomed! Please note our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.  Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com for more happiness insights.

Criticism, Control and Happiness

CriticismControlNoText-drea

Criticism And Control Occur So Frequently Together They Are Practically Synonymous.

Criticism Is Almost Always A Power Play.

People criticize to try to assert their superiority, power and to gain control of people, situations and interactions.

Critics assert control by planting doubts and disparaging or damaging ideas in  people’s minds.  They may or may not be factually correct or beneficial.

Criticism Is Corrosive.

Criticism leaves people deflated, demoralized, confused and uncertain about what they should do. That’s often the critic’s intent. Critics like to leave people feeling badly and powerless, that’s how they exert power and control.

If you can get a person to doubt themselves, their ideas or their abilities, it’s easier to control them, dominate them or at least get them to defer to your desires.

Doubt is often all you need to dominate and dissuade others from differing with you.

Criticism Is Counterproductive.

Criticism focuses on what’s bad, wrong or unattractive.

Calling something is bad does not describe what is good.  Saying something is wrong does not express what is right or desirable.  Describing what you don’t want does not not communicate what you do want.

Criticism only helps to the extent it expresses what to avoid.  Criticism does NOT present clear descriptions of successful solutions,  strategies or what you can do to improve.

Criticism Is Often A Deliberate Distraction – Critics criticize to derail other people’s success.  Deflecting or dealing with criticism takes time, energy, attention and resources from positive, important activities. It’s easy to find yourself worrying about what critics say is wrong rather than focusing on what is truly important to you.

Focus On What You Want To Achieve, Articulate Benefits.

Habitually Happy people focus on what they want to achieve.  They can describe why it is desirable, beneficial or attractive.  Clear goals help define the steps to attain them.

They spend just enough time with wrongs so they can rapidly recognize and reject bad things.   They then redirect their attention, energy and enthusiasm to positive activities that help them build happiness and spiritual success.

Focusing on why they are working and striving for their goals reinforces their desire and drive to achieve them.

Recognize Criticism for What It Usually Is – A Corrosive, Counterproductive Power Play.

Treat criticism like any other Negative Judgment:  Ask can it help me in some way?  If YES, turn those negative judgments into positive action items.  If NO, don’t give critics your time, attention or concern.

Focus On What You Want To Achieve.
Enjoy Your Progress And Eventual Success
.

Copyright 1999-     , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Explore HappinessHabit.com and HappinessBlog.com. Our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors. Photograph from Dreamstime.com